Wednesday, April 18, 2018

What Will She Think?

We were sitting at the baseball park watching her brother and she runs over and says, "this is my momma, my Uncle Willy, and my Mimi" - as she shows her new friend her family.

My Mimi

Those words might just be some of the best in my life.  Grandparents understand.  There is just something about being someone's.

My grandma lived in a different time.  She was born in 1900 - and she lived almost the entire 1900s - leaving earth in 1995.  She saw a whole bunch of stuff.  But she did wonder why we had one of those in our wedding.

One of our groomsman's is a black man.

My grandmother had taken on the same viewpoint of many white people during those days.  I only wish that "those days" were in the past - but I am not naive - they aren't - 

However - what will she think about me?  Will she be thinking what I have been thinking for a while - and particularly this week.

The "Buried Truths" podcast just honestly breaks my heart.  I wish it was just a fictional story that I am listening to.  Instead it is a brutal truth of what happened in our world in the 1940s, 1950s etc...  It is a horrible account of what happened to a couple of men that chose to vote - a couple of black men who chose to vote and chose to help other black citizens vote.  

Civil Rights. 

I wonder what she will think.  She won't have to worry about her Mimi supporting the ridiculous actions that are described in Buried Truths.  The prejudice behaviors of whites against blacks are easy to deny and speak against.  I honestly hope that my grandmother would have joined me.  

My grandma was a good person - I just hope that it was a lack of education and a lack of understanding - and honestly a lack of reading those red letters in the Bible and truly believing that they apply to EVERYONE.  I hope that is who she was.

But what about me.

What will she say about her Mimi?

Will she say that I was uneducated, not an understanding person, not tolerant, and that I really did not grasp those red letters?

This podcast episode on "Hidden Brain" spurred these thoughts this week.  One quote from the podcast is "... how do you convince people who once slaughtered each other to join hands and make peace? Is it possible to change a person's deepest beliefs?"

I realize we are not "slaughtering" each other in the true sense of the word - but who am I slaughtering with my thoughts - with my lack of understanding - with my less than loving ways spilling out?

I have a new friend.  She is the author of a book I am reading.  

Sara's book "How We Sleep at Night" is her story and one that just grips my heart.  

Fear can make one do some pretty stupid things.  I am convinced that fear makes your brain stop working.  Really.  Seriously.  I grew up in a society that used fear as a method of discipline and honestly for me it worked.

It has never worked for my children and I suspect it won't work for her.  I know that I will have to explain my reasons to her and I best come with an answer of proof rather than "we have always looked at it that way".

So before I stand on the premise that I get to decide who receives God's favor and who doesn't - I better know.  And I better have red letters to support.

I follow a Red Letter Christian's podcast with Tony Campolo and Shane Claiborne.  I found this article today on the website...

Here's the link to the article - Stand .  Mr. Caldwell said exactly what I have been trying to say in this blog.  

I have dear friends, family, people I know who are a part of the LGBTQ community.  

I don't have all the answers - to ANY of our questions.  

I do know that I do not want her to wonder what her Mimi thought.

Her Mimi loves - that is what I want her to think.

One day my mom's earthly body will lay with this stone.  This scripture has defined my mom - she has always sought His help and recognized that her help has always come from the Lord.

My dad always spoke of love.  He began every prayer with the phrase "Father thank you for loving us."

I never talked to my dad about the LGBTQ community.  But there is no doubt in my mind as to how he would respond.  

With love. 

Matthew 22:34-40, NLT

I know this scripture.  However look closely at verse 40 - a verse I forget to quote when I am saying the Love your God part...

Verse 40.  The entire law and all the demands of the prophets are based on these two commandments.  

I am the first to tell you that because "I love you then I feel compelled to share my viewpoint.  I know you need to see it my way.  I am right because I understand what God intended.  I know.  You don't. Blah Blah Blah."

But really - just LOVE.  And sometimes that means Stand and open our arms rather than our mouths.

Why do we make that so hard?

Photo by Mirus Studio

Always, May the grace of the Lord Jesus Christ, and the love of God, and the fellowship of the Holy Spirit be with you all. 2 Corinthians 13:14.