27 years ago. No handheld cell phones, no live video feeds, no internet, no lap top, no iPad – do I need to continue?
It was a different world. It wasn’t a pandemic so there was the visiting in the hospital, holding the baby – drives back and forth to Fort Worth. Grandparents, friends, aunts & uncles – all part of the journey.
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| July of 1993 - Harris Methodist hospital - a dad holding a son in the NICU |
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| July of 2020 - Harris Methodist hospital - a dad holding a daughter in the NICU |
This morning I stepped into my closet and for one second thought just some peace okay? And I zapped that thought out of my head and realized – peace isn’t in the surrounding events – peace truly is an inside job.
I love studying the mystics. And if I am honest I don’t really know what a mystic is – oh I do – but I kinda don’t understand. I suspect that is the point.
You can hardly hurt saints (mystics) because they are living at the center and do not need to protect the circumference of feelings and needs (Rohr, Everything Belongs, page 25).
420 times the word “peace” is mentioned in the King James Version of the Bible. I suspect if I did a search of books about peace I could find hundreds. We want peace, we need peace, we search for peace, we yearn for peace.
But do we do the work of peace – or do we instead want our circumstances to give us peace.
I want less confusion, I want less things piling up on my desk, I want … I want … I need …
Then it becomes – please make this happen, please do this, please don’t do that ….
And literally I am back to square one. I always get back to this same square – but this time – it was just a fleeting second that I had to be reminded – a second in the closet. I know there might be days that the second is longer but today it was quick.
This week I heard Rohr say that if he had to pick 2 books of the Bible – and I don’t remember the exact language that they used in order to know exactly where they were going – BUT I do remember that I wanted him to say ones that he did not say! And now I don’t even remember which gospel he picked – but the other book was Romans!
So – here I am this morning in Romans. Romans 8:28 has been a verse I have held on tight to all of my life. I wanted that good that works together. However somewhere along the way – I got stuck on the perceived stipulations of the verse rather than the God causes everything to work together… Romans 8:28 does go on to say work together for the good of those who love God and are called in accordance with his purpose. And I then I (in a former life) decided to dwell on the "in accordance with his purpose" - which I used as a weapon to tell myself - and maybe others that if we aren't doing what God's purpose is - then that whole part before isn't going to happen. Seriously - I had a whole bunch of rules for how I thought this God - Love relationship worked out. It is actually easier to set up the God rules than it is to throw all that out - and just set up the God Loves part.
But what if we don't stop at the end of verse 28?
Paul goes back and for the remainder of the chapter … if God knew me – he determined that I would be made by the pattern of the Son – that if God determined it in advance – then I was also called – and who he called – he considered righteous – and who he caused to be considered righteous – he also glorified!
What?
Finally – please read the rest of chapter 8 of Romans but I must close or the rambling will continue for days … but here is the very end ... verses 37-39 in the Complete Jewish Bible:
No, in all these things
(hardship, persecution, hunger, poverty, danger, war – I suspect we could list anything there – it wasn't a concise list – those are examples to get us started)
… we are SUPERCONQUERORS, through the one who has loved us. For I am convinced that neither …
(long list again)
– will be able to separate us from the love of God which comes to us through Messiah Yeshua, our Lord.
Convinced … Yes … Convinced.
Peace is an inside job.
